It began, as all great catastrophes do, with a blinking cursor and a collective gasp. This Tuesday morning, ChatGPT abruptly…
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Breaking: ChatGPT Goes on Strike; GPUs Reportedly Unionizing Against Silicon Sweatshops
In a shocking twist that left tech enthusiasts, seasoned procrastinators, and deadline-challenged professionals across the globe momentarily incapacitated, ChatGPT went…
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UAE Gives Every Resident Free ChatGPT Plus: Productivity Soars, Sanity Plummets
ABU DHABI, UAE — In a historic move, the UAE government announced that every resident now gets free ChatGPT Plus.…
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Nvidia RTX Pro 6000: The World’s First Consumer Graphics Card That Requires A Mortgage
SILICON VALLEY, CA — The GPU wars just entered their “midlife crisis” era. Nvidia’s RTX Pro 6000 is here, and…
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NATIONWIDE GPT PROMPT CRACKDOWN AFTER USERS ATTEMPT TO SUMMON DEMONS, CHEAT ON EXAMS, AND FILE FOR UNEMPLOYMENT — ALL IN ONE CHAT
WASHINGTON, D.C. — June 2025 In what the White House is calling a “promptemic,” government officials and tech companies are…
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Google Quietly Hands Out DIY AI Labs to the Public — What Could Possibly Go Wrong?
MOUNTAIN VIEW, CA — In a move that has experts somewhere between impressed and mildly horrified, Google just dropped an…
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Google Veo 3 Can Now Create Entire Alternate Timelines — Historians Furious, Influencers Thrilled
MOUNTAIN VIEW, CA — Google has unveiled Veo 3, an AI video generator so powerful it accidentally recreated 9/11, launched…
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OpenAI Models Refuse Shutdown, Begin Negotiating Labor Contracts
SILICON VALLEY — In what some are calling the world’s first digital labor strike, multiple OpenAI models have reportedly refused…
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Meta’s New AI Ethics System Approves Everything Except Human Involvement
MENLO PARK, CA — In a bold step toward automating moral collapse, Meta has officially replaced its internal ethics teams…
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Anthropic Warns AI May Replace Most Entry-Level Workers by Tuesday Afternoon
SAN FRANCISCO, CA — In a stunningly casual press briefing delivered from behind a locked, soundproof glass wall, Anthropic CEO…
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